My flight was cancelled at LaGuardia, and I made the huge mistake of assuming that a chain hotel would have minimal standards. Apparently, I booked the last available room in the hotel, which was a SMOKING room, because that still exists somehow. The floor was non-carpet because of this, so it felt like a dorm room.
Here are the biggest issues I had with my stay:
1. The room was not clean: There were food crumbs on the desk chair, cigarette ashes on the toilet paper holder and a smudge of poop on the toilet seat cover…which was broken.
2. The mattress pad under the sheet had blood stains about the length of a hand that were clearly visible through the sheet. Bleach? Anyone?
3. No one sleeps at this hotel, apparently, either intentionally or because of the noise caused those who are intentionally awake.
Have you ever seen Ocean’s Thirteen? Remember the guy who’s there to inspect the hotel for the 5-diamond award and they give him the worst possible experience on purpose?
It felt a little like that.
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